1. How does the creative process work? I mean, how are you supposed to create a piece of jewelry for me when we haven't even met and I don't even know what it is exactly that I want?

That is the key question around which a website like mine is built. How am I supposed to make a profitable business based on producing high quality custom made jewelry at a good price for people whom I might never meet face to face?

The first stage, of course, is knowing what you want. You can't get what you want until you know what you want. You have to ask yourself a series of questions. "Do I need birthstone earrings for my girlfriend, a wedding ring for my fiancé or a replica of a pendant I saw on "American Idol"? When do I need this item and how much do I want to spend?" This can be the hardest question of all and yet is the most pertinent. It really is true that you get what you pay for.

The design itself is the key and can be the easiest or toughest question of all. If you've just started your search then look through my portfolio. If you don't see anything there that interests you then you should keep looking elsewhere. However, I'll bet that something does grab you and hard. Then we'll have some directions on how to chase the final design. Again, you can't get what you want until you know what you want.

Stage two: after an extensive in-person interview (if you're local or want to make the trip) or phone discussion about your jewelry wants and needs, I'll produce sketches which will hopefully narrow the focus. Do you want sterling silver or gold; if gold, what color and karat: with or without a stone; do you know the ring size? All pertinent questions that need to be asked.

Stage three: depending on the complexity of the final design, this might be a wax carving of the ring, pendant, etc. The thing for you to keep in mind is that I'm only working from the neck down after a certain point. I will make suggestions as needed and shepherd you toward desirable ends and away from pitfalls. In the end, I will make whatever needs to be made. In other words, I don't have to wear the finished piece..Uhhh.I design with your mind in mind, that's it.

2. What if I already have a stone that maybe my Grandmother left me? Can we make a whole new ring out of it?

Yes. Of course, keep in mind that your Grandmother got a lifetime of wear out of that stone and if it's not a Diamond, Sapphire or Ruby then it's probably pretty beat up. Keep in mind also that the Lapidary Arts have come a long way in just the last twenty years. I have gemstones in my collection of which I was justly proud in 1980, now I can hardly stand to look at them. But I digress.

The material quality of a gemstone is only a small part of its real value and I'll do my best to set most anything that comes my way. Sentimental value is very real and I respect that. I don't respect much else but I do respect that. There are certain parameters of quality and usage beyond which I won't venture. No cracked diamonds, no bear claws, no tanzanite in rings. I'm sorry, let me back up.

First of all, many of the less expensive diamonds are actually broken on a crystalline level and can't take much pressure. This is why they are cheap enough to be set in fistfuls in the rings sold on QVC. It doesn't please the jeweler to break stones he didn't sell in the first place.

Secondly, regardless of what Stephen Colbert says, bears are entitled to their claws. When they are brought to me to be set in jewelry I can only wonder how the bear is doing without them.

Lastly, there are certain limitations inherent in the making and wearing of jewelry. Tanzanite and some other well known gemstones are relatively soft and not able to withstand the abuse of wear that a ring puts them through. Yet jewelers all over the world set them into rings anyway, knowing the limits of the stones themselves. This is often seen on cruise ships where the jewelers know that their customers won't be around to complain next year when that expensive tanzanite has worn out.

3. I'm seeing so many different styles in your photos. How am I to know who you truly are as a Designer?

That's a good question. Keep in mind that more than half of the images you see were custom pieces of work for individuals with concerns much like your own. The rest are styles which I enjoy and in many cases represent pieces I made entirely for my own amusement. I don't really have a signature style all my own, in fact I regard personal artistic styles to be little more than straitjackets which can be difficult if not impossible to shed when they become burdensome. Most importantly, consider that this is a portfolio of thirty years of jewelry design. Forms that thrilled me in 1980 don't necessarily anymore. These are just the images I choose to show. Believe me there are many more I don't and many more that got away without being photographed.

4. I've seen a pair of earrings on your site and I just want to buy them as is. How do I do that?

First off let me tell you how much I love you as a customer and as a human being. You are truly a scholar and a gentleman, gentlewoman, whatever. First, make a note of the image number and maybe a general description of the image and give me a phone call. You can also use my contact form on this website. After many gratuitous complements about the quality of the Jewelry and the website itself, you'll give me your address and I'll send out the requested item one week after your money order has arrived or your check has cleared.

5. I've just seen a pair of exquisite earrings on your site and while I think they are some of the most amazing examples of the goldsmith's art I think I've ever seen and a real addition to the sum total of the Art of Mankind, they're not quite right for me. I'd like to have them done in white gold not yellow, set with rubies not amethysts and maybe just a touch longer. Not much really, just a bit...I mean my girlfriend's head is a little.......bigger than it should be, not freakish really but..a bit bigger than it should be. You know what I mean?

Hmmmm. Yeah, I think I know what you mean. I will do everything I can to make it your way because you're the one who wants my work, you're the one who wears my work and you're the one who pays for my work. Most importantly, you're the one who loves my work and tells your friends and family about me and my work thereby making more work possible. Believe me when I say that it is of tantamount importance that you, the customer, my future best buddy, be thrilled with not just the final product but the entire experience of the transaction.

6. So why should I trust you to do anything for me anyway? I mean, you're just some guy on the internet for God's sake. Why shouldn't I just go to the jeweler in the strip mall and hope for the best? I'm supposed to send you a bunch of money and hope that it turns out okay? Give me a break!

My but we are a pessimistic lot aren't we. For many of your jewelry needs the guy down in the mall is just fine. When you need your cobra chain untangled or your watch battery changed, by all means he's the man. You should only call me to make your dream a reality. I will be posting testimonials from ordinary citizens like you who will gladly broadcast their satisfaction.

Speaking of trust, I require a deposit of half at the start of the project, and the rest only on completion of your dream. I don't take credit cards and I don't intend to get screwed in another of these "Oh you can trust me because I'm a Tempe Firefighter." deals. Been there. If I can make it any easier let me know how.

7. How do you do it after all? Do you have a hollow tree stump full of elves or what? I know, you type it all into a computer program which spits out the finished piece at the other end right?

Believe it or not that is beginning to be a reality in the jewelry trade. The computer thing, not the elves. Many pieces of jewelry you see on TV sales programs and in department stores are fabricated primarily by machines. Not in my workshop, however. I am a one man band who does everything from write copy for my website to mailing out finished items to customers who are about to be thrilled. I am an old school kind of goldsmith who alloys my own gold, pulls my own wire and polishes my own work. If the images on the website aren't quite clear enough for you, you can blame me for that too. And by the way, you sure do have a lot of questions.

Thank you for bearing with me through these Fictitious Annoying Queries and if you have real questions about anything jewelry related please ask me and I'll post them along with a real answer right here. I Thank You All.